What do I do now? My wife has another human being growing inside her. I obviously know that she’s been pregnant for some time (nine weeks to be exact), but it didn’t quite real until today. It’s one thing to hear that you have a child on the way, but it’s totally something else to be shown this little thing the size of an olive that’s supposed to grow into an entire human that I’ll be responsible for.

Have you guys ever thought about how wild pregnancy is? Like, the whole process of a woman creating another human being from nothing? It’s really insane. The baby already has little arms and legs and I don’t know what to make of any of this, to be honest. I can’t even articulate how I feel. It’s some combination of bliss, fear, paranoia and disbelief. The whole process is just overwhelming. I wonder if it ever goes away and I’ll turn into a normal human again.

Rachel wanted to Skype the appointment with me, but I was stuck at work. I was better off not seeing everything live though. I would’ve been a mess. I’m still a mess 11 hours later, but at least I can peacefully write about it here instead of cursing at doctors and/or crying in front of the people I work with. That’d be lame.

The appointment itself was uneventful, fortunately. There weren’t any complications and the baby is growing faster than normal and we can hear the heartbeat and oh my God I’m gonna be a real life father, you guys. I have a feeling that we’re having a daughter, so I’ve hired a really good architect to design a high quality dungeon for her the moment she reaches puberty. It’ll have wi-fi and and windows so she can actually see sunlight and everything. She’ll love it. Lord help me. Is it corny to have a picture of the ultrasound framed? Probably. I don’t give a shit.



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